The winding of the year...

With the winding of each year...
pouring of each tear symbolizes growth...
From the people you lost...gained or loved the most..
To the inconsiderates, manipulates, concious liars...
I transpire to continue to inspire the hopeless

I focus on a new vision
a new decision to cut those worthless things out like an incision...
As I transition into a new year, I hear a new call that I must answer...
If I continue to play deaf, my respect for self will become less and less potent...
SO its important to stay real
On all the things I feel, I have to confess that deficating thru the soul helps best... Getting out all of the bile, of soul ties and mess, Lies and family stress, At best, I get better every year. Life of trials, yet of cheer.. Not feeling myself with lies, and mistakes, but of drives and high stakes of achievement...

Excuse me for my bareavement of loss hope..
The hopeless ness of my eyes shall never show...
I will continue, I will continue to strive strong...
In my eyes I could do no wrong...
So I am awaken by this ultimate power of Greatness...
I live to to breed Faithfulness in the Most high God
If I am called I must answer...For the the fate of the world I carry like a lattern. For I have my own light to shine....
In due season as the seasons change...
I maintain a front of the same...image.
FOr this thesis I live it...
Contagious like a satisfying scratch
I match each blow with a hit of my own
I become strong...stronger than the enemy...
The devils in sheeps clothing that befriended me...
I laugh...sitting here waiting until your time is done
Because you don't Fall down...then I will come up...
as my face rises, there will be no tears...
For the end of time has come...in the winding of the year.

Earnest Prayer

Dear Heavenly Father,
I have to confess...
that my spirit is dirty
and my mind is a mess...
My image is distorted
and my life full of stress...

I was afraid, but you said not to fear
For my angels are around you, and I am always near
For God so loved the world, he sent his son
Ended the enemies journey before it begun!

God has all the victory, Praises from my trials too
Showed me the way, through my storms you've brought me thru...
Dear Heavenly Father I just want to say Thank You!

LIVE Daughter Live...

As I sit here and think,
I remember, a time before many septembers of a happy family.
The one whose structure was stable...
who Followed the Holy trinity...

As I sit here it comes to me...
where the structure broke up this dynasty...
He killed the hope in me...
It Broke the heart in me...
It stole the Joy of me...
It controled my everything...
It kept my lips from speech...
so bondage took over me...

As I sit here it awakens me...
He is not an "IT" he's my destiny...
He breaks the chains of depravity...
unlocks my joys, peaces sanity...
He says I am your savior, come with me...
I'll show you truth, if you believe in me...
I'll be your roof if you live in me...
I am the way to truly set you free...

See those other gods don't compare to me...
I am wiser, apart of the trinity...
I report to a father that's above me...
I bring a spirit who loves for me...
So daughter Look to me for your safe keep...
In me the devil has no power...
no locks or chains that can devour you...
So as we sit here... He says get up...No time for sitting still, its time to move on...Move away from the pain and the old temptations... Fill your life with God's creations...Be a blessing to those who don't deserve it...Come out of deceit and be done with it... Always tell the truth to get rid of the burden.... Climb out of immorality...into eternity...LIve, daughter...LIVE!

Just Believe...and be Restored.

I read that God can take your trouble and change it into treasure. yoour sorrow can become joy not just a momentary smile but a deep, new joy.It will be abubbling experience of new hope that puts a brightness in your eyes and a song in your heart.In the midst of the darkness you will learn lessons you might never have learned in the day. We all have seen dreams turn into ashes ugly things, hopeless experiences but beauty for ashes is God's exchange. Offer yourself to God and ask for a spirit of praise so your whole being will be restored...B.Johnson....He's waiting...

Just keep reading...

I lie down, motionless..
feeling emotiionless
living without focus
have so many talents, but can't make the most of them.

Torn, between dreams and reality
trying to build a bridge where the two can meet
look in the mirror and see two different me's'
I see a girl 5'3 with an average build
egyptian eyes, secrets filled

I am a fraud in one dimension
embarrassed by the truth, so I will not mention
what am I doing, who am I and where will I be?
I have an updated perscription but I still can't see

So I stop,
I kneel,
I ask God to begin to reveal
What God, What do you see?
Right now, I can't see beyond me...

Well daughter that's because you are selfish...
until you feel for someone else
your life will feel breathless

God I need help, God please send me help
I have equipped you with what you need, so look up and stop blaming yourself.
I, God feel like I am a lost hope
Filled with all type of bad memories,
drowning, and trying to stay afloat.

God hear me, not really trying to yell...
God help me to ensure I won't fail
All I know is I have a story to tell...
slowly but surely it will unveil...
so just keep reading...

God says...

Although my feelings feel real
God says, "the heart is deceitful, who can tame it?
Although the world around me says to live life to the fullest..
God says, "Be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind.(Romans 12:9)
Although I am not worthy
God says, I am the apple of his, before I was formed in my mother womb he new me (Jeremiah 1)

This is the Truth, although you read all the scriptures and like my poems this is what the Lord says to just the proclaimers and not the doers of his word...Jeremiah 23: Woe to the shepherds who are destroying and scattering the sheep of my pasture! Declares the Lord. Therefore this is what the Lord the God of Israel, says to the shepherds who tend my people: "Because you have scattered my flock on them, I will bestow punishment on you for the evil you have done, " Declares the Lord. I myself will gather the remnant of my flock out of all the countries where I have driven them and will bring them back to their pastrue, where they will be fruitful and increase in numbe. I will place shepherds over them who will rend them and they will no longer be afraid or terrified, nor will any be missing, declares the Lord. If God does not lead you to speak, then don't speak! I have learned that even if you want to encourage someone, ask God what to say to that person, because what you want to say may not be the same as what God wants them to hear. God bless you all!

I asked God

In my time of prayer I knelt
To tell the Most High how I felt
to confess my sins and other filth
hoping our bridge would be rebuilt...

I confessed about the materialist lusts
my bills, wills, and all the unjust
tears streaming because of my rutt
God healed me with just one touch...

He says hello my daughter I was waiting on your call
Just a matter of time before you fall
You can't go a whole day and not speak to me at all

Come to me, and I will draw near
In my word speaks a true love so don't fear
I love you so much my dear, I hear...

I say God please hear my crying plea
if you would not punishment for all the deceit
I promise to do better just wait and see
I am here by myself walking thru this journey.

He says you are alone because you choose to be,
find loving people with my spirit, in your chosen ministry
Be careful for those who look like me,
devils they are in sheeps clothing

I say God, but I am afraid
He says I built you as sturdy as a tree
For you to bear fruit and be strong spiritually
so pray for guidance and I will lead thee.

God I am praying, and praying, but do you really hear
you say you will draw close, but you don't seem near
I shut my mouth so your voice I may hear
But your silence is evident, its so loud and clear

Where is your faith daughter, I am standing right here
God I need your love, I am failing down here
I am around so much murder, so much despair
what do I go, who seems to care

God says: Cast your cares upon me I truly want to know
all about you inside including the feelings you don't show.
I am more than a God above your head, I am he who records all the tears you have shed. I am he who is ruler of all, both big accurances and small, I am your protector so do not fear, If you draw close than I am near.

God hear me and take heed
you are who I desire most, you are all I need. So when doubt tries to over come me I will say I believe in all that God says, it will rebut and say how do you know...I will reply because I asked God...Thank you God, I love you!

I find myself...

I am sitting here laughing...
parked two cars down, you cheating on me...and I see you.
I want to hear the new excuse...
I find myself following you everyday, just to see what the new one looks like, and to hear the new excuse.

I am throwing up...
I lie here next to you, and cringe just thinking about all the nasty people you have been with... How their dirt and filth is all in between our marital sheets..
I find myself sick to my stomach when I look at you, and the things you do to me...

I am on a ramp page...
I have thrown all of your things in the trash and in bags, all over the front lawn, Bottles of colognes burned and all of your photos are gone...
I find myself getting rid of everything that is you, I used to get sick when I saw you now its the mere scent of you...

I am crying...
not of sorrow, but of joy... made room for a man of God...and threw away a boy
I find myself shouting, and praising God...For that reason only I sob.

I am different...
Everyday I wake up to clean sheets, and Joy in my heart..
Work outs and a brand new start... My own business, and my schedule only to follow...No longer smelling your unfaithfulness, no more lies do I have to swallow...
I find myself looking in the mirror and loving me, no longer dealing with mess, or a person who cant really stand me. I have a God upstairs that looks down on me with Real LOVE...Nothing can shake my faith, I feel his strength even from above. See God says to Delight yourself in him and he will give me the desires of my heart. So much time wasted I don't know where to start. God is my everything, and you are just a faint memory. You are the mere image of what a man isn't supposed to be. I am happy, I am shouting and there's nothing you can do. Because, Today my past mistake...I find myself without you....

Enjoying God through experience...

Go to God in prayer. If you are hungry for him , cry out to be filled. He will fill you" with an inexpressible and glorious joy" (1Pet 1:8) Thank God that he is drawing you to himself. If you do not have this hunger ask God to fill you with desire for him, to extend your intellectual beliefs about him from your head to your heart. Pray that you may "grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ....So that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God" (Ephesians 3:18-19)

Enjoying God through the word....

Read John 6:35-66 This teaching of Jesus brings about a parting of the ways: From this time many of his disciples turned back and no longer followed him" (Jn 6:66). What is so offensive brings life Jn 6:53-55. Without Jesus you cannot have eternal life. You must go beyond intellectual belief to a life sustaining relationship. your relationship with Jesus is your life. Unfortunately, this is where many refuse to follow. If you are hungry for Jesus, praise GOD! He is drawing you to himself. Be thankful for your thirst God is working in your life! Danger comes from those who are not water out of the room. Jesus says to the Pharisees, "You shut the kingdom of heaven in men's Faces. You Y9ourselves do not enter, nor will you let those enter who are trying to" Matt 23:13 If you are hungry for Jesus, reach out to him. Don't allow anyone or anything to stand between you and the one who can satisfy.

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Forgotten Promise

Beyond me
I see
God
Through his eyes He has shown me
What lies behind me, the grave?
Through his son’s blood I can be saved…
So, through faith just call his name…
He says, I am your love
So to all those who have hurt you, I have put to shame…
So no more crying, he wipes away my tears...
No more hiding, he took away my fears
No more wounds from fighting, he says I am now your shield.
A true warrior, in u I have built
A blossoming flower, which will never wilt…
He says I am your love…
Through my eyes your are blessed
And with time this love will be expressed…
I am your source…
Through me you will stay on course…
Through me, I have made galaxies, within galaxies
Spent, rained in and out of time…
But you, my daughter you are my prized…
Possession...
Your soul is my obsession…
Your worship, I truly dwell in…
Your temple is where I am liven’
Truly made in my triage’s image
So within your parts I have hidden,
The keys to success, for your womb to birth in…
All the answers you need are within…
All the strength to move forward is already been given.
When things here get rough, I am not far
I’ll be coming back again…that’s my promise…

My Worship....

God...
To You,
I am beauty...
Gorgeous in all your favor...
Resting in the relief of a victorious savior....

I am Me...
Dancing in the Gardens of my heavens, Deepened vails of edens
Your presence....I live in...
This is my worship...

God...
To Me
You are liberty...
Truth, and love in his simplicity...
Journeying upon my shoulder like a Dove...
Rests a promise from your son...

In this I am reminded of an awaiting paradise...
With your hands, I land, lump as clay
As I lay...and as you push I form a better shape...

This is our worhip....

As each eye is formed, I get a better glimpse...
On my lips, you place, an everlasting kiss...
Thru my airways enter my lungs....
a new remedy for hurt...a whispering song...

A song you force a boast....In me lies a treasure, I pleasure in most...He is my being...
Your thriving Holy Ghost....

This is my worship...

God,
As your word walked in his form
Coming out of a new cacoon, a new chapter is born...

Pushing to break free of my shell...
Written on my toungue is a message to tell...
Out comes rhythm...melodic scripture...
His is the living word...I am the picture...

You cultivate the lyrics...I am the speakers for people to listen...
I am the microphone for you to spit them...

This is our worhip...

I open, you pour in...
I let out...You draw in...
My mouth stays shut...Your arms open...

God is not a being..He is more than a person...
He is the air, I breathe...Until the spirit has returned home...
He is my worship....